A life? Cool! Where can I download one?
(Atom: Hahahahahahaha! Um, yeah.)
There are three types of people in this world: People who can't count and people who
can.
(Roger: ... Oh!) Blonde moment? (Roger: -grumbles- Everyone's
allowed some...)
"I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man were to challenge me to one, I would take
him quietly and forgivingly by the hand, and take him to a quiet place and kill him." -Mark Twain
(Atom: I wanna do that, too!)
Always remember that you are unique, just like everybody else.
(Roger: As if nobody has ever though of that before. -rolls eyes-)
To err is human. And stupid.
(Atom: Does that mean humans are stupid?)
Even if you're paranoid, maybe they really are after you.
-eye twitches-
Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.
(Roger: Why do you have that up here? It's going to jinx us!)
What?!? This marriage is OVER! (Roger: Wha..?)
Fungus is actually alive. Be afraid.
(Atom: Now I'm going to have bad dreams.)
Never try to lick a glacier for some moisture.
(Roger: Um...ok.)
Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
(Atom: Are you trying to tell me something, Klug?)
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
(Roger: Is this why we have a paper shredder?)
You can't teach an old dog new tricks, but you can beat him repeatedly with a rolled
up newspaper.
(Atom: Now I want a dog.)
Never call a man a fool. Borrow from him.
(Atom: Roger, I need a twenty, you know, just to tide me over...)
Some drink at the Fountain of Knowledge. Others just gargle.
(Roger: -cough-Atom-cough-)
We live in an age where pizza gets to your home before the police.
(Atom: Woah...)
Kids in the backseat cause accidents. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.
(Roger: Is that where ours was conceived?) Nope, this one was conceived in that bathroom stall.
(Roger: Oh, yeah... That time we did it in the backseat, you only thought you were pregnant.) (Atom: Ew. Ew. Ew.)
If guys had periods, they'd brag about their tampon size.
(Roger: o_0)
Friends are like condoms. They protect you when it gets hard.
(Atom: As far as I can tell, you guys never used a condom.) (Roger: Yeah, that takes all the fun
out of it.) (Atom: ...I'll keep that in mind.)
