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The Life of Anna

Quotes

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Here are quotes that I like. Most of them describe me perfectly. Seriously.
(Roger: -coughs loudly-)
Oh, yeah. Sorry, I forgot.
(Roger: You forgot we were going to have sex...?)
Um, yeah.
(Roger: Just get in here, so I can get in you.)
-rushes in-

A life? Cool! Where can I download one?
(Atom: Hahahahahahaha! Um, yeah.)
 
There are three types of people in this world: People who can't count and people who can.
(Roger: ... Oh!) Blonde moment? (Roger: -grumbles- Everyone's allowed some...)
 
"I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man were to challenge me to one, I would take him quietly and forgivingly by the hand, and take him to a quiet place and kill him." -Mark Twain
(Atom: I wanna do that, too!)
 
Always remember that you are unique, just like everybody else.
(Roger: As if nobody has ever though of that before. -rolls eyes-)
 
To err is human. And stupid.
(Atom: Does that mean humans are stupid?)
 
Even if you're paranoid, maybe they really are after you.
-eye twitches-
 
Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.
(Roger: Why do you have that up here? It's going to jinx us!) What?!? This marriage is OVER! (Roger: Wha..?)
 
Fungus is actually alive. Be afraid.
(Atom: Now I'm going to have bad dreams.)
 
Never try to lick a glacier for some moisture.
(Roger: Um...ok.)
 
Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
(Atom: Are you trying to tell me something, Klug?)
 
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
(Roger: Is this why we have a paper shredder?)
 
You can't teach an old dog new tricks, but you can beat him repeatedly with a rolled up newspaper.
(Atom: Now I want a dog.)
 
Never call a man a fool. Borrow from him.
(Atom: Roger, I need a twenty, you know, just to tide me over...)
 
Some drink at the Fountain of Knowledge. Others just gargle.
(Roger: -cough-Atom-cough-)
 
We live in an age where pizza gets to your home before the police.
(Atom: Woah...)
 
Kids in the backseat cause accidents. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.
(Roger: Is that where ours was conceived?) Nope, this one was conceived in that bathroom stall. (Roger: Oh, yeah... That time we did it in the backseat, you only thought you were pregnant.) (Atom: Ew. Ew. Ew.)
 
If guys had periods, they'd brag about their tampon size.
(Roger: o_0)
 
Friends are like condoms. They protect you when it gets hard.
(Atom: As far as I can tell, you guys never used a condom.) (Roger: Yeah, that takes all the fun out of it.) (Atom: ...I'll keep that in mind.)
 

That was just...wrong.

Quotes From My (So-Called) Life

Roger: Hello...sweety.
Me: -thinking- What the...? -talking- Hello, shnookums.
***
Atom: So, um, have you read my quotes page?
Me: Atom, you have sick and twisted friends. Can I meet them?
***
Roger: -on knees- Will you marry me? -closes eyes-
Me: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!
Roger: -opens one eye- Did that actually work?
***
Atom: -taping video with me- Wait...are we, like, on?
***
Me: -singing- We're knights of the Round Table, we dance whenever we're able. We do routines and chorus scenes with footwork impeccable. We dine well here in Camelot, we eat ham and jam and Spam a lot.
Atom: -whistles the rest of the song-
Roger: -to me- Remind me again why I think you're an adult.
***